my mother

I like my mother, I really do. Ask anyone who knows me. I talk to my mom at least once every two days, I like visiting her, and I always follow her around when I'm home (much like what I did when I was 2 years old and unwilling to part with a parental unit). We always have things to talk about, I can tell her mostly everything (in time), and of my two parents I'm definitely closer to her.

She's in town now. I am seriously questioning my own sanity. Perhaps I was too quick to conclude that we get along. Perhaps I was delusional to think that we have a healthy relationship.

Two minutes after picking her up at the airport, she asked me if I had instant noodles, the Taiwanese kind. I replied no. (Alex doesn't endorse "junk" in the house, and I hardly ever crave it. When I do, I drive for 5 mins to T&T, buy one pack, indulge, and wait another two months before the next urge hits me.) She then proceeded to list all the failed expectations of not having a warm bowl of soup and noodles, especially after such a trying long day that she'd had. Egged on by her hunger, she then asked her next question (and I feel like she must've know the answer deep down): Will I have coffee tomorrow morning? I replied no, I don't have a coffee maker. I was almost defiant in my response because I knew that would add fuel to her fire, and sure enough, it did. How could I possibly invite house guests when I don't have a necessity such as a coffee maker? Um, because I want to buy a Saeco Odeo Gira Espresso Machine that makes Caffe Americano but haven't found justification to drop $1,000 on it?

Anyway, this really set the tone for the rest of the night (two hours). In the hours between travelling home (making a pit stop in Chinatown for noodles before my ears fell off from her whining) and going to bed, she decided it was absolutely crazy of me to

a) not own window treatments in my north-facing windows - $2,100 for Hunter Douglas Silhouettes, why would anyone have bought window treatments after getting a quote like that?! We are looking to do something eventually...
b) not have a kitchen backsplash - I want to do stainless steel subway tiles, so it's taking a while to organize it. Meanwhile I take perverse pleasure in ruining my wall above the stove because it'll be covered up eventually anyway!
c) want stainless steel tiles - apparently that's a sign I'm "cold".
d) make her sit on my Bertoia chairs at the dining table...don't you know, she almost FELL OFF! - Um, I like my designer, I like the choices we made together, and you can sit on the upholstered fancy chairs if your unbalanced butt wishes
e) not have all upholstered fancy chairs - that'll be $2,000. Will it be on your MasterCard, Mom?
f) not have updated lighting fixtures - seriously, who cares. I know I'll get there eventually and for now, I have enough light to function.
g) not have a junction box over my dining table - again, who cares. She doesn't know this, but we only bought the table less than two weeks ago because imagine if we didn't have a dining table for when she came to visit!!
h) not have renovated my bathroom. I won't even go into details here because that'll just end up being a post on its own.
i) not have two bathrooms - I feel like she's Rachel's sister and I'm Rachel...yes, you may go upstairs and use the "second" bathroom. Say hi to the people who live there.
j) not have breakfast materials - I daren't tell her I don't eat breakfast at home generally. I was too tired for another defensive argument.
k) have "dirty" floors - I'm sorry if your feet picked up some dust. I do not live in a bubble and there is likely some "floor-stuff" on my floors. I refuse to devote my life to cleaning daily and certainly don't have the money to pay for someone else to do so for me!

The list really went on, and continued again in the AM because I stayed home until 9:30 before heading over to Ogilvy and then Aeroplan for meetings.

Honestly, ask me on Tuesday next week how I feel about my mother. I may very well have changed my opinion. What if she becomes one of those bitter old people who just criticize others to make themselves feel better(?)...like Monica's mom!! Ugh.